Wife Life

Strip club
Soccer practice
Grocery store
Keeping the pantry properly stocked
Being stocky
Trying to fit in with the guys
Watching world poker
Therapy
Suppressing emotions
Rereading Jane Austin novels
Playing sudoku
Attempting the crosswords
Failing
Having your hair dyed (so no longer grey)
Becoming your mother
Snipping
Pruning
Nagging
Bragging
driving mini van
school bumper stickers
Being the authoritarian
Be the girl scout troop leader
Running errands
Redecorating
Childproofing
Hiding the weed from the kids
Locking up the booze basement
Lying
Never letting your kids believe in Santa
Performing household chores
AKA, laundry, bedside manner, cleaning, scrubbing, fabricating, bathing etc
Chip and Dale show (I’m premiering)
Slaving away in … (kitchen, garden, car repair, interior designs magazine , etc.)
Being pregnant
Rearing
Mounting (picture frames)
Paying bills
Balancing the Check Book
Ordering dinner
Tipping too much for delivery
Forgetting the call the babysitter
Being a home body
Spying on neighbors
Cleaning the litter box
Dog walking, in hopes sparking conversation with fellow dog lovers
Watching law and order
Loving Bob Barker
Netflix
Checking my g-mail account
Logging out
Doing kids homework
Babying
Playing favorites